i am a ruin of myself

to kill a loner or to be killed by him?
out there was no one but me.
up here there's every one but me .
expecting changed men 
trapped amidst the frames of  childishness
my ego   my achievements   my persona    erected
though they move around , see around 
but talk to the gates 
while the antenna is silently moved to the next level
the image of one's who made us , bind us
had they whilst everything else touched a bit of my clay
d have stuck a bit of em on me 
i grow , as if under a veil
overnight they think
whilst they splash at the swamp they think i still am.

i dont shine , nor do i light up at dusk for them to be noticed ,
might be coz they vandalize me on my rough skin
or might be coz am i still 
under construction as i was.